For Excitement, Hillman Was Unstoppable

The Age

Wednesday May 28, 1997

David Morley

OUR Engineering Hall of Folly continues to grow as response readers dig deep and just keep on giving. Have you ever owned a car that was so fiendishly put together it refused to be worked on? Do crazy examples of automotive design remain to haunt you? If so, we want to hear about them and, judging by the response we've had, so do Auto Age readers. Don't hold back, share your grief.

From Peter Freeland, South Yarra: My first car surely combined all that was amazing, uncertain and entertaining - combining all the best and worst ergonomic features possible. Here are a few . . .

It was a 1914 Hillman with a new body fitted about 1930. It's engine had no cylinder head; it was bored from beneath and the spark plugs screwed in from the top.

The clutch pedal was reached by curling the left leg around the gear lever.

The "brakes" consisted of a strip of lining wrapped around the tailshaft. This made for exciting motoring when the tailshaft periodically pulled out of the differential. Real exciting stuff: no go and no stop.

The RACV finally said it would no longer help by lifting the rear end while I stuffed the tailshaft back in.

The plate glass windscreen would finally shatter into shards of daggers when the body twisted too much. Great fun especially for lady passengers.

The electrics included the choice of lights, wipers or horn. Any two together were OK, but try to use all three at once and it was total blackout. What memories. Thank heavens they don't build 'em like they used to.

Response: I can't even begin to imagine the drama and emotions that would have flowed when the tailshaft dropped out. Not having drive is one thing and not having brakes is even worse. But to have both disappear together makes my hair stand on end just thinking about it.

How on earth did you survive these exciting times?

Actually, brakes were never a strong point in many early car designs. Most companies had enough trouble getting the darn things to actually go without worrying about making them stop at the other end. Subsequently, braking systems took quite a while to develop.

Early versions such as the friction strap around the tailshaft as on your Hillman were diabolical set-ups that, even when they were working, provided very little in the stop department.

Brakes which acted on the wheels were much better, but early attempts used either cables or solid rods joining the pedal with the brakes for actuation, neither of which was anywhere near as good as a hydraulic system.

In many cases, too, brakes were fitted only to the rear wheels but, as we know today, the front wheels do most of the braking.

How far have we come? A long way when you consider that most people don't give their brakes a second thought, the systems require very little in the way of maintenance and a modern car can lock all four wheels on a bitumen road with minimal pedal pressure. Try that in a 1914 Hillman.

The curious Wolseley 24/80

Anon, western suburbs: I write as Anon to protect me from the Wolseley Mafia.

The Wolseley 24/80 Mark 1 had some very curious features. It was one of the last cars to have a dog on the front of the engine to accommodate a crank handle (cranks and Wolseleys have a very long association). The chrome radiator cover also had an entry point for the crank. No crank handle was provided.

If, however, you attempted to use a crank on the engine, you immediately punched a hole in the radiator core which was placed between the entry point in the grille and the dog on the engine.

The front doors were attached to the body by Phillips-head screws which invariably corroded into the holding brackets. An impact driver was required, but you could only use it if you managed to remove a door first.

While this vehicle was reasonably common as a used car, all manual versions for sale had a worn-out clutch. In theory, to fix this, you could undo the gearbox and just drop it out. In practice, this was a little harder.

The universal part came off easily (this should sound a warning on any English car). The first lot of nuts came off, no drama. It's only when you get to the nitty gritty part that you find out why BMC/British Leyland had such a chequered career.

Finally, there will be two nuts left holding the gearbox. One you can reach from underneath the car, the other is accessible from under the bonnet provided the engine is not there (and it is, of course).

This last bolt, you can not see, feel or reach. It is on top of the housing.

Solution? The first and most practical one is to remove the car from the engine (messy). Second: Remove the engine and gearbox from the car (messy/bitchy). Third and most common: Get a drill and jigsaw and cut out a large section of the floor to gain access to the last bolt.

The only problem with this is that by this stage of its life, the footwells on either side will be almost rusted through. This means you have just chopped through the only unrusty structural bit in the floor.

Please destroy the original, envelope and postmark before publication. I swear you to secrecy on my identity. They have ways of making you talk.

Response: The Wolseley Mafia, eh? If they're anything like the cars they represent, they'll probably corner me and make me an offer I can't understand.

For an answer to your car problems, write to Response, Auto Age, 250 Spencer Street, Melbourne, 3000, or fax Response, Auto Age, on 9670 7514.